Old El Paso Frozen Beef Enchiladas

The internet bought me dinner. Thanks, internet. It’s been a long few days. I’ve discovered that I’m like a hydrophobic substance- terrified of bonding, and that I have a lot of work to do before I’m actually an attorney. Did you know that law school is not simply a sixteen-minute montage of uplifting KC & The Sunshine Gang songs and pretty power suits that fit perfectly in the bust? It gives an entirely new definition to the term ‘qualified privilege,’ which is funny to maybe three people here. I feel oddly content, though, despite that I have impending exams and papers deciding the fates of imaginary clients. It feels good to accomplish things in the real world- cooking being the sole omission of said accomplishments. 

DSC_6533I’d say the most tragic part of the week is following up one of the most satisfying Mexican dinners of my life with this dinner, actually. The two experiences are literally polarized. One, forthcoming, was authentic and cozy and made me want to cook forever and sing to my appliances in bastardized Spanish, and the other made me cry, a little, which in turn added flavor to the wholly bland dish I was furnished with for the sake of this review. I micro-baked these for 25 minutes. What’s micro-baking? Well, according to the package, it’s the best way, and it’s a combination of microwaving and baking. It’s very interactive. I could almost feel Julia Child’s wracking sobs and Laguiole harikiri. DSC_6531The plastic, ovensafe tray was more stable than the enchiladas, which fell apart on the way to the plate and gave new meaning to the term ‘deconstructed.’ Yikes. These are flimsier than drunken oral contracts and equally unsavory. The enchiladas are made of corn tortillas, shredded beef, cheddar-jack cheese, and a guadjillo chili sauce. I tasted none but the chili sauce, metallic and vague amidst an onslaught of generic spices reminiscent of Doritos. It’s a pity as the ingredient list reads sparsely and organically, incorporating vegetables and fresh, unique components versus artificial alternatives. It’s getting closer to what people want when they don’t want to cook- with a little more texture and heat, it would taste pretty good. A better balance of ratios and less of a reliance of tried and tired ‘Mexican’ flavors would make these much more palatable. The best bites were those that were not coated in sauce- they were crispy, crunchy, and seasoned well. The rest faded into a vague blur.DSC_6532Behold, my presentation skills. I’ll be a bonafide mommy blogger come Sunday. Disclaimer: MyBlogSpark and Old El Paso facilitated my emotional eating and gave me a $10 gift card to buy the gas to go to the third Walmart I schlepped to to find these. They also gave me a Mexican-inspired chip and dip plate that is entirely too large for anything outside of scale models of UFO invasions. Disclaimer II: I’m stressed and overworked, so this is going to be like a less funny version of Grumpy Cat, now with 100% more pathos until exams are over.

rating5

5 comments

  1. Rhonda

    Uh oh..I have a box of these enchiladas sitting in my freezer right now….I bought them after I tried the Old El Paso chicken burritos which were very good!

    I guess I will try to jazz them up with some cilantro and crumbled queso fresco to try and make them better when I get around to heating them up in the microwave.

    • Jess Watsky

      Good call- it’s not that they’re awful, they’re just very, very average. I just ate the last of the leftovers and found that the middle parts- with less tomato/chili sauce had a few more palatable flavor. A higher ratio of corn tortilla and meat to sauce, I think. Jazzing them up would be a great idea- let me know how they turn out!

      • Rhonda

        Well Jess,
        You were totally right…I finally ate the beef enchiladas and while the overall taste was not bad (I was surprised by the good chile pepper heat and flavor of the sauce). I was very disappointing in the lack of any amount of texture from any type of meat in them…I wanted to taste a little tug from some shredded beef but there was none..just mush…so I give them a failing grade like you…no amount of gussying them up helped! LIke, I said before though the chicken burritos are really good but now I won’t try the beef burritos because I will be afraid there will be no shreds of beef.

    • Jess Watsky

      Isobel, you naive thing, that’s where you’re wrong. As of tomorrow, I’m officially changing the name and title of this site to ‘Foodette Slop Fest,’ where you can come check out your various slop fest reviews and restaurants. Of course, they’ll still be rated from 0-10.

      After all, it’s not like this is a site where I feature real photos of the real food that I eat, or actually portray things as they are and not on the package, so I guess I can’t really justify my heinous portrayal of such a delicacy. Sry.

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